Engagement party invite wording & guest list?

My mom is throwing the engagement party, not me. She needs me to help her with invites and providing the addresses for everyone.





Etiquette wise, I know not to invite anyone that isn't invited to the wedding. BUT there are nearly 200 invites for the wedding and the backyard won't fit more than 40 - 50 people.


Is it rude to not send an invite to out-of-state people in order to keep the list down?





While the engagement party is not a gift-giving occassion, I know some people do give a gift. Would it be awful to note "no gifts, please"?





My MOH is planning a bridal shower in the future and I'm sure the folks invited to the engagement party will be included in the shower and I don't want them to think we're having these parties for the gifts.





And for the engagement party, does anyone know of the appropriate wording of the invite? Or somewhere to find samples?

Engagement party invite wording %26amp; guest list?
Yes, 40-50 people - local only - is very appropriate for an engagement party. It is slightly different because for this you'll have couples, at a shower it us usually women only.





And I little remark such as "Your presences is the only gift we want." is a polite way of saying "no gifts"





http://www.invitationconsultants.com/sam...
Reply:Invite your closet family members to the wedding and then just invite who ever eles to the wedding don't worry about the engagement party, you could send them a card, just to let them know that your thinking about them. Don't you dare put no gifts on your invitations take all the gifts you can. You could also give them a choice, the engagement party or the shower, but if I were you I wouldn't worry about it. Do what you want to do, If they don't like it tell them to sue you, it's your time to shine. they won't stay mad forever.
Reply:There is an EXCELLENT web site to help you w/ wording your invites - www.verseit.com





As far as the gift situation, inclue at note at the bottom or on a separate paper in the invitation saying something like, gifts are not required, but if you want to show a little love, we'd appreciate a donation to (your favorite charity) and that way they will be giving to a good cause!





Good luck!


C.T.


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